02 Jan 2015
Had a crazy experience on NYE. Beau wanted to do some spiritual exploration after his grandmother died. During said exploration I experienced something new and strange.
In a world full of visuals and beautiful colors, I was also in a lot of pain (endometriosis). I was hiding my face in a pillow when I sensed my ‘mother’ loving me and wanted to connect with me. Then my slightly taller ‘father’ also tried to connect. At first I felt love and comfort and happy.
Then I realized that these entities were not the energies of my earthly parents. My earthly parents are also separated by thousands of miles.
Their almost “pie slice” of space in my visuals were completely grey with almost a light noise/tv static look, where everything around them was colorful and vivid.
I recoiled and stated matter-of-factly “you are not my mother!”
They left, for a while at least. Towards the end of the night, our music kept shutting down for no reason. I felt something awful in the room. I didn’t know what to do except shout out loud “Go away!”
The rest of the night I had at least a pie slice in my view of completely B&W (and greys) with no color. It was very disturbing to me.
When I started falling asleep, I had nothing but foul images of eyeballs popping out of heads and faces melting off of skulls.
Only Beau’s arms made it go away.
I was in so much pain, I gave in and took 500 mg of Ibuprofen. Almost too instantly, I felt a patch of loving comfort over my pain. I say “patch” because the small areas bordering the relief still very much felt painful. Like the areas bordering a heating pad are still colder.
I finally fell asleep, but I can’t remember a single dream. Only the sense that I was fighting against evil somehow.
I’m so lost. Who were these entities? Were the grey “Mother/Father” the same as the blackness I felt? Who was healing my pain?
I’m starting to enjoy these journeys less and less after August. That was the last truly blessed journey I have been on.